home again.

i arrived home tuesday evening.

with great fanfare i left DC.

it was a bit intense for me.
i think my midwestern self was a little overwhelmed by the accolades. to be showered with praise publicly was intense. the congregation was incredibly kind and generous.

i spent the weekend packing, writing a sermon, and spending moments with the congregation.
a family that had adopted me, made sure i did not spend those strange last few moments alone.

it was much less of an adventure moving home.
no uhaul trailer attached to the marshmallow.
only 2 days of driving.
just wanting to arrive and process.

i don't like limbo times.
i don't like the times in between projects, events, activities.
i am a little antsy right now.

i feel a little strange missing DC. it was an uncomfortable home for me.
i love looking like the people around me. i love that i don't get stared at in grocery stores in mpls. i love that i can find food that i can eat and good coffee.

yet...
somehow i planted a few roots in DC. they started to grow.
i cried as i began to chant the kyrie.
somehow i made a home.

one more year of school.
a practicum.
a research paper.
some classes.

then...
i get to walk in two commencements.

but for now, i will hold my friend's newborn daughter.
as we sat in the kitchen on thursday, the little one threw her head so that she could lay in the sun as i held her. even at four weeks, she sought out the sunshine. so, i held the little one as she slept in the sun.

and...
i think maybe i did learn to preach.

the last friday.

i just finished vacation bible school.

i went into this event with my feet dragging.
i am just not cut out for little kid type ministry things.
mostly i am baffled by what to do for three hours with them. once we are done with bible story time...well, frankly i am a wee bit lost.

i love talking with the kids, i just don't really get how to structure the time. i do much better when they get to middle school...

well, i made it. and...the kids had fun. they didn't seem to mind coming and even seemed to want to come back each day. which made me feel like i hadn't completely failed in my responsibilities.

it was a weird sort of blessing that vbs was in the crazy last week that i am in DC. it has kept me too exhausted to think about what it means to move home.

last night the lovely 20s-30s group from reformation took me out. they toasted me, gave me a lovely card and ...a gift certificate to barnes and noble. the comment was, "some of us remember how you brought 6 books to a 24 hour retreat." well! you don't know what you might need!!! you must be prepared for any book emergency! it made me laugh, they know their vicar well. it was so sweet.

i don't like long drawn out good-byes. it is hard to have had a few weeks worth of dinners and parties. i like to just say good-bye and get in the car. it is stressful for me to think of all the people i need to check in with before i go. yet, that is the lifestyle i have signed on to as a pastor.

it is nice, though, in a way...
i am finding out all the people that liked having me here that i didn't realize.
i am finding out all the folks that received ministry from me that i didn't realize.


now that vbs is over i am slowed down just enough to think.
it is sad to leave this place.

i fell in love with people.